But all love is conditional, no exceptions. The thing that pissed you off is that you didn't like the conditions and that is normal, that is how it is supposed to be.
She is not wrong and she is not evil, that was just her condition.
Most of the time, when you want to change someone to love them, you didn't love'em in the first place.
You are in love with a projection of a perfect being that loves YOU unconditionaly and you want the actual person to fit into that projection and when they don't, you get pissed, but when you are not projecting you don't get pissed.
Then you love the person, even if she makes lot of mistakes, doesn't do exactly what you want her to do.
THAT is love. You try to change yourself or adapt, to fill the gaps that the limitations of your beloved create.
Of course that if there is too many problems, you'll get tired, but the interaction between the two of you will show that stress and if love is great enough, both of you will start doing something to minimize the problems and limitations.
That's how I think about it.
Comment by zeb on September 10, 2011, at 12:57 AM
Retrieved from https://kinhost.org/Comments/Blog-The8-trackInOurHead-20110910T000916
But all love is conditional, no exceptions. The thing that pissed you off is that you didn't like the conditions and that is normal, that is how it is supposed to be.
She is not wrong and she is not evil, that was just her condition.
Most of the time, when you want to change someone to love them, you didn't love'em in the first place.
You are in love with a projection of a perfect being that loves YOU unconditionaly and you want the actual person to fit into that projection and when they don't, you get pissed, but when you are not projecting you don't get pissed.
Then you love the person, even if she makes lot of mistakes, doesn't do exactly what you want her to do.
THAT is love. You try to change yourself or adapt, to fill the gaps that the limitations of your beloved create.
Of course that if there is too many problems, you'll get tired, but the interaction between the two of you will show that stress and if love is great enough, both of you will start doing something to minimize the problems and limitations.
That's how I think about it.