We do not expect people to remember this stuff, but this is basically a shortcut "highlights" list rather than stare at a hundred names. Because we're LegoCrisses, we can also have a tough time pinpointing people because the Front is a blend of many components at any given moment with components being removed or added on an as-needed basis. This one's skills with that one's moods with this other's interests. It can get messy when we get blendy, so we aren't always 100% certain who we are all the time.
We are much more likely to front as full individuals in a plural-safe environment.
Gender presentation is neutral unless otherwise specified.
Fronting Fragments
- Criss (mask, neutral/fluid, they/them) - As far as we can tell, this is a combined autism/DID mask and helps "normalize" ourselves amongst singular & neurotypical folks. It's costly in terms of spoon upkeep and cost for authenticity, and is probably a major reason we get exhausted when out in public. The more "real" and relaxed we can be, especially in both neurodivergent & plural safe spaces, the less energy we expend on simply "seeming normal" and trying to process what others are saying and doing in ways that go above and beyond what others might need to expend to just exist. With the mask on, we all answer to "Criss". Hence "The Crisses". We often have trouble removing the mask; it gets stuck. It blends any stand-out traits like accent or facial tension changes so that our switches are less notable; it makes us even more covert (even to ourselves). Folk will often mistake us as being Criss, thinking that's one of our internals, and wondering when they'll meet anyone else, when the truth is we're constantly switching and blending behind the mask so they've actually "met" many of us and just don't know it.
- LEGOCrisses (modular polyfragmented subsystem - they/them) - at any point our system may assemble fragments from our modular subsystem into a "Criss" to handle a particular situation such as GroceryCheckoutCriss or a task-based WorkCriss, etc. We try not to spend much of our time in this state, which is generally depersonalized and (to us) robotic in nature. It's "going through the motions" and uncomfortable for the named people of our system. However this is what our system defaults to if we're too dissociated due to pain, anxiety, or doing things no one in here really wants to do. This state just gets things done and is not introspective or particularly self/selves-aware.
- Continuous "I" - (Movie about our Continuous I) shared point of view consciousness/awareness fragment that often attaches to the fronter but sometimes either takes off on its own (in which case we brown out, having lost our interfaces to the body's sensory input), or detaches from the external interface to follow someone either in the internal world or an out-of-body excursion such as shamanic journeying (in which case we leave the body in a meditative state as a rule). This sensory interface fragment is hooked into our logbook and memory banks, so what we all are aware of or can remember generally follows this fragment. Folk can go off on their own and share information with the group from their experiences, but not full-sensory, full-memory, or first-hand like we can through Continuous "I". This fragment exists to help us blend in and remember things so that we can interface with a singular-normative world "seamlessly" even though we're constantly shifting and changing who is fronting.
- Logbook - Continuous "I" records to the logbook, and we can specifically "Note" things there. The logbook is accessible to those close to front, and some of the information from the logbook is passed to mid & long term storage. It's recent, short-term and active memory, in short. But it has a "physical" inner world analogy/representation for our system.
Main Fronts (often cycles through other folk for days, weeks, or months at a time) - Spring 2023 update
- Elvair (he/him - half-elven sidhe) - ageless grandfatherly presence, loads of top-down thinking and planning ability, strategist, egalitarian. Heading our internal planning board. Sometimes works with brainstorming groups, etc.
- Moonlite (she/her - elf) - deaf alter, non-verbal, fluent in English, rusty in ASL. One of our main writers for our books, content producer on the back end for topics on our podcast, & contributors to Kinhost.org. Works with our coaching squad. Very friendly, sense of humor, loves playing pool (as in cueball).
- Buck (he/him - human) - deeper voice, gruff, rough around the edges, crass sometimes, short of temper overall, main interests around human rights activism (so that's why he's so grumpy ;) ), protector, look for manspreading, wild gestures, frowning a lot. Masculine.
- Lissie (they/them - self-identified "Barn Cat") - if there are animals around, you're likely to see Lissie. Since they've been doing the petsitting tasks lately, and human folk usually aren't around, they probably won't be seen in public much. Loves housekeeping ("playing house"). Also our green thumb! We've always had trouble with indoor plants until Lissie became coconscious.
- Dreal (she/her - elf) - shamanic work, spiritual work, Reiki leader, out of body work, connected to most of our Reiki guides. One of our main parents, and coaches.
- Hawthorn (she/her - human) - Teen, appx age 16. Some stims, autistic, anxious. Cooks, likes food. Follow the bouncing leg.
Secondary Fronts
- Drendel (she/her - sidhe elf) - public relations, large events, diplomacy, organizing and running events, managing expectations in crowded places, managing events and delegating tasks. Works with Elvair on our inner planning board. Femme.
- Evie (she/her - human, young) - shameholder, currently a passenger/semi-cocon and working on issues with the help of Elvair and others. Buck is her shame-defender, it seems. For what that's worth.
- Isabeau (she/her - succubus) - around 18 years old, also can handle geeky tasks like server administration, design, etc. Impish, wry humor, may blend with Faun for work tasks. Prefers nudity, may fidget due to body dysphoria (she has horns, wings and a tail). Femme.
- Star (she/her - elf) - healing, care for people who are sick or in pain, Reiki, spiritual work, priestess, liaison to some of our Deities. Works in our reparenting center, and sometimes cameos on our coaching squad.
- Heidi (they/them - blend) aka "the Triplets" - cooking seems to be falling to the blend or any portion thereof of Eve, Hawthorn & Isabeau. Hawthorn has generalized anxiety & tells to go with it. Isabeau is mentioned below. Eve is quiet, thoughtful, practical, reclusive. As a blend, Heidi presents as a bright and practical young adult or older teen. Femme.
Tertiary Fronts
- Justin (he/him - non-Earth human) - deeper voice, ribs folk, easygoing, even-tempered to humorous, still getting a feel for fronting. Very vulnerable to passive influence from other folk internally, sometimes answers them out loud. Masculine. Moved to secondary front since he has a physiological reaction to sugar and the passive influence issues.
- Almerissa (she/her - Melnibonean elf) - protector, can be ruthless and cruel if that gets the job done. Not nice, but efficient. Might seem delicate and dainty ? more at refined ? but can cut a person down easily if pressed. Usually if she's fronting, there's a serious issue no one else can handle. Femme.
- Taelee (she/her - elf-panther shapeshifter) - protector, capable of catnaps with one eye open anytime anywhere in a single bound, notable accent and usually blunt and brief when she speaks. Can take over when everyone else is too tired to give a spoon. Sometimes goes on long out-of-body vacations.
- Frank (they/them - human child) - if there's original art, graphics, icons, etc. being done, Frank usually has their mitts in it. Funny, young (around 8-10 years old), sometimes even silly. A little shy. Introject of a childhood friend.
- Aliessa (she/her - angelic dryad) - public relations, large events, magnetism, intimacy, getting "dressed up", makeup, dresses, etc. when she gets the chance. Prep for being on camera or stage. Flirty & forward. Ultra-femme,
- Juliet ("Jule", she/her - merfolk) - somewhat femme adult, merfolk, loves fish (cooked or uncooked), serious. Anxious.
Others front as well, but not as regularly as the above.
Abridged Headmap
We have a new therapist who is interested in a headmap to help keep track of who we're talking about or whom is fronting in therapy. So we created an abridged map that includes our frequent fronts and the folk we're most likely to be dealing with or discussing in therapy. So here's a totally abridged/edited map.
