Working on Work-Life Skills: plurals on the job, on the go, getting things done, managing life
We may want or need to get things done in our life, and not spend all of our time in recovery. We can throw ourselves into the workforce, and take our chances — but there may be things we can do to make adulting and working more successful and help us balance our spoon load so that we don't crumble from external pressures.
These are resources and suggestions for how to develop a work-life balance as a plural or DID system, and some troubleshooting assistance.
Also make sure to check out At work - considerations and tips for the workplace.
You may also want to check out the table of contents section on Functional Multiplicity for other related skills & topics.
- Have a safety plan in place. The course is completely free and self-contained with printables, etc. or you can use any notebook or loose paper you'd like to work on your plan. But don't just have a plan, really use it and update it frequently. It is your custom-designed plan for handling stress and helping you to track symptoms (any symptoms, even physical disorders, so you don't have to have DID or PTSD — if you are autistic, if you have an autoimmune disorder, etc. it will help). Keep a copy of your plan with you even while at work (scans on your devices, or keep it in an online document).
- To learn more about stress, triggers, and managing personal energy, make sure to follow the safety plan with the Developing Better Spoons course (sliding scale, so make sure to check the course description for how to lower the price). This course can also help with figuring out good careers or jobs that would suit your system better. Note that Better Spoons is a practice, so it can take time to sink in, and to build habits around it.
- Y'all may want extra help so consider this article if you have considerable issues with emotional regulation even after taking the Better Spoons course New.
- Onboard several headmates New and work on a working plan together. Pooling skills, working out who fronts for work. The podcast episode may be enough if y'all already have a decent working relationship web in your system. The best way to do this if you need to start from total scratch is going to be using the United Front Boot Camp.
- You may wish to brush up on your Communication Techniques to make sure that y'all are able to track information about work and communicate better around work & life management topics.
- Take the United Front Ship's Log Planner course (course is free — purchasing our planner(s) is totally optional, we don't check if you have the planner to take the course!). Whether y'all use a bullet journal, whatever planner y'all have at-hand, purchase our planner, or just use a lined notebook or wall calendar — you will want to create a task and project planning & tracking system that will help your system throughout the adulting process. The course is based around time management portions of books like Getting Things Done (by David Allen) and 7 Habits for Highly Effective People (by Stephen Covey) — only transformed for plural systems. We'll periodically update the course with more time management skills information and if y'all use electronic PDF mark-up applications, you can get our downloadable undated planner ($5 USD) and just keep using it each year if you want. There are some free downloadable forms in the course also for things like planning projects and so on.
- If headmates are upset about working or y'all are having intrusions during working times, consider these:
- If folk are rebelling, try the System Trust Issues New podcast series.
- If you have a lot of issues with system kids who need or want attention, or are getting triggered during work, we recommend you at least attend our Building a Reparenting-Focused Community session from the 2020 Plural Positivity World Conference. There's also more info in the reparenting article here.
- Arrange for access or accommodations as needed New.
- Troubles with a very compelling inner world? Check out this article Balancing Internal & External Life New.